web.figure1.net

Figure 1.

Why "figure1.net"?

When I finally got a statically addressed high speed link at home, there was a moral obligation to register a clever domain name to it. Amongst the many things that came to mind, which weren't already taken, this gag customer service response Charley Kline showed us provided the best inspiration.

Why "web." and not "www."?

Say "WWW" out loud. Say "web" out loud. Which one rolls off the tongue faster? Fuck what's popular, I'd rather be practical.

What's here?

Whatever I feel like putting here. Some of it is for entertainment:

My friend Keith's ass, captured long ago by Amy Ryan
Two people getting it on at a baseball game. (It's always nice to score at the ballgame...)
Keith claims this is mayo in his mouth, but I'm not entirely convinced...
Charley wrote a script to generate random metal band names, inspired by Beavis and Butthead's This Book Sucks (I tweaked it slightly to spit out the text encased in a web page.)
Advances in technology have made clothing more revealing
Nobody's safe from sports violence

My personal home page is also running around here somewhere. If you know anything about the domain name system, you can find it.

What's not here

Warez, mp3s, or a place to get a shell account. I don't need leeches abusing my bandwidth, or opening up security holes on the system through maliciousness or carelessness. Nobody has an account here except me. And it's going to stay that way.

I'm offended by what I've seen here!

Make an appointment to see a dermatologist. Your skin is too thin. In the meantime, See Figure 1.

SSL certificates for $50/year or less

On the playground, they call it "The Daily"... -- contact the webmaster for the domain figure1 dot net